Before I found much healing, I hesitated to ask for anyone’s help–especially my husband’s. Besides, I was an independent woman. I didn’t need anyone’s help. But over the last six years I felt overwhelmed by everything, and I needed his assistance–bad. But I was still afraid to ask. It felt too vulnerable. So I did a full 180 and became too direct. It didn’t help.
Then I came up with a way of wording my request to help ease my fears. All I had to do was add, “Hey, Sexy,” onto the beginning of my request:
-“Hey, Sexy! Can I get you to open this jar for me?”
-“Hey, Sexy! Will you mind running to the store while you’re out?”
You get the picture.
Over time, it expanded to include:
-“Hey, Muscles. Will you mind refilling the woodpile this weekend?”
-“Hey, Tall, Dark and Handsome, where are you taking me for dinner tonight?”
And you know what? He didn’t mind. I think he actually liked it.
And helped me remember his unique qualities, his manliness, which were things I forgot about over the years. He felt like I needed him again. And it gave me opportunities to see he was more than willing to help shoulder my burdens, so over time I felt less overwhelmed. Ahhh!
Plus, after we healed, it wasn’t bad for our sex life, either 😉