There is such a thing as the “societal trauma” I’ve seen play out in my own life and in the lives of others.
The typical situation a woman relates to me involves someone’s impatience/harsh words regarding her response to her guy’s addiction.
It reminds me of the three “friends” who came to Job, telling him all the ways he was ‘doing it wrong.’ But Job stood in what he knew was true.
Probably the most recent time I’ve experienced this was when someone told me my issue with my husband’s addiction must be because of my insecurity… and how his wife was completely secure with herself to the point of going to strip clubs with him.
Because I knew the guy, I answered him. I answered him directly and succinctly.
(Funny thing: The next time we got around them, his secure wife showed exactly how insecure she really was. Maybe I’ll share the details in group sometime, but I thought it was interesting and was glad God confirmed my gut feeling.)
Anyway, when I’ve gone through this type of situation, I had to understand lots of unaware people will an opinion on what I should and shouldn’t be doing… and I had to get distance from people who would be demanding like that.
Later I learned this:
The betrayal trauma experts (who know how women are further injured) is that it’s best to go at the woman’s speed in order to not traumatize her further–even if it’s not what the helper would do, or within the timeframe the helper would do it.
Well when we have a whole society that gets impatient with our healing (possibly because they’re insecure about their own hidden actions), it can traumatize a woman further–especially if it’s coming from someone within her community.
Societal Trauma is real and it’s something to guard against.
One of the quickest ways to begin healing from all sorts of trauma is by telling your story.
Have you had an experience with this type of trauma?
Feel free to share your story below. (Don’t worry about someone confronting you out here. I control which ones get posted, and will not allow someone to violate your vulnerability.)