In a previous post, I addressed “his big libido.”
But I’ve also heard men say, “My gal doesn’t mind my porn use. I have a high sex drive… or I need variety… or (whatever).”
I’ve talked to many women who’ve said this to their guys—that they were okay with his looking at other women.
- Some said, “I was trying to be the ‘cool girlfriend.'”
- Some said, “I went to the strip clubs with him. I certainly didn’t want him being with any of the dancers!”
- Several said, “I watched porn with him… only to make sure I remained part of his sex life.”
Almost all regretted giving in instead of asking for his faithfulness—especially when, during sex, he looked at the screen instead of at her.
WOULD SHE RATHER…
I want to ask those guys, “Sure your partner may seem like she doesn’t mind your porn use. But have you ever asked her if she would rather you get off to thoughts of her instead of other women?”
I can guess what his partner would say.
I know what I would say. What about you?
WHAT TO DO:
If you told him you were cool with his porn use but have since changed your mind, discuss it with him. Let him know you’re no longer comfortable with it. If he resists, look around this website for tools to help him understand your point of view. (It can be done! Some of the women I mentioned did so, and it greatly improved their lives!)
WHAT TO AVOID:
If you’re new to all this, avoid feeling obligated to be the ‘cool’ girl. One of you has to be faithful to what you want, and if it’s not him, it’s got to be you. Be honest with him and stick to your principles.
WHATEVER YOU DO
You deserve a great life! If you need help finding one, get in touch with me. I’ve been researching the issue for years and can save you a ton of time.