One of my greatest regrets is not listening to music more often. It moves me and speaks to me and heals me.
And during the healing process, it empowered me.
One song I wish I’d had in the early days of our healing is I Wish I Could Break Your Heart by Cassadee Pope. I thought, “Not that I ever would, but a small part of me wishes I had it in me to break his heart. Sometimes I wish I could make him feel the same pain I feel over his lying and internal affairs, just so he could understand it.”
I’d wished I’d been strong enough to ‘throw him back a little thunder’–maybe then we wouldn’t have stayed stuck for so long.
- It would have caused me to more quickly revisit the hard talks without allowing myself to be shut down.
- It would have caused me to more quickly learn how to voice what was true for me without shutting him down.
- It would have caused us to more quickly have the relationship we both wanted.
But mainly I felt this way: I wished I could’ve broken his heart, as in,
“I wish his heart was engaged enough to break…
I wish he cared enough to be affected at all.”
He was so disconnected for such a long time, and this broke my heart.
I don’t draw your attention to this song to get you to act on this wish. No, just voicing your anger instead of your request will usually work against you.
And “Getting even” will always work against you.
I just think this song just puts to words what many of us ladies are feeling on the inside, whether we know it or not.
Yup, those were sad days, so if your relationship is in that place, just know I wish it wasn’t, and be encouraged that his heart can wake up again!
Anyway, here’s a link to the song. I hope it strengthens you.