He Doesn’t Understand My Pain (3 invalidations) – 4.11S

Disagreements can lead to 3 types of invalidation, as well as 1 unique way invalidation erodes trust–especially when she feels he doesn’t understand her pain. We discuss this with Matt Fray, as well as a couple things the guy can do instead.

TIMESTAMPS (click on a time below to be taken to that section)
0:00 Intro
0:14 Our male clients have a lot of trouble with this
1:05 One Solution: How Matt explains it to male clients *
1:51 How disagreements lead to invalidation
2:41 3 ways we habitually invalidate (the triple threat) *
6:27 Another thing that erodes trust (he’ll do it again) *
7:55 How Jay created greater breakdown with Lori
9:01 One Solution: Pain is part of the healing process? Instead try this…
10:54 In the next episode: “Isn’t she over this yet?”

https://thecouplecure.com – Jay and Lori’s website
https://matthewfray.com – Matt’s website
https://pornpainhealed.com – Lori’s site for betrayed partners
https://porniskillingme.com – Jay’s site for porn addiction recovery


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